Live New Yorker Cartoons: Parsley, Puritans

Live New Yorker Cartoons: Parsley, Puritans


-Now, David, I don’t need
to tell you, one of the most popular features
in “The New Yorker” are the cartoons. -That’s right, Seth. We have a strong tradition
of balancing our hard hitting-journalism
with ridiculous jokes. -Yeah. That sounds great. -You should try it some time.
-Okay, that’s a burn. [ Laughter ]
That’s a Remnick burn. And now, in what has become a
tradition here on “Late Night,” every time you appear
on the show, we present
Live: “New Yorker” cartoons. -And I professorially explain
why each cartoon is funny, because we all know that the
true key to comedy, Seth, is? -Timing. -No, it’s me, the clown prince
of cartoons himself. David Remnick.
-Oh, right. That’s right. Can’t argue with that.
So, without further ado, our theater troupe in residence,
“The Late Night Players,” are happy to debut
their newest piece — “Live: New Yorker Cartoons
Part Eight: ‘Ride hard with a Vengeance.'” [ Explosion ] Our first cartoon is
by Benjamin Schwartz. -Damn it. Cilantro ruins everything. [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -Now, David, would you care
to explain that cartoon? -Seth, do you like cilantro? -It’s fine. -It’s not fine, Seth.
It’s disgusting. It destroys everything from fish
to salad to this man’s marriage. -Ah, yes. And, David, just curious, what do you think of people
who do like cilantro? -They’re sociopaths. -Okay, excellent.
[ Laughter ] Alright. Our next cartoon
is by John McNamee. -Let me start by saying, “No one
is a bigger feminist than me.” [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -Very strong. Very strong. David, what did we just see? -Seth, as interesting
as it would be for us, two white men of deep privilege, to have an engaging discourse
about feminism, I think the true meaning
of this cartoon would be best explained
by the woman at the stake. -Yes. Okay, Allie, what does
this cartoon mean? -Men are the [bleep] worst. -Okay.
[ Laughter ] Yes.
[ Cheers and applause ] -She has a point. I don’t think I could have said
it any better. -Me neither. You know,
we have — we have a couple seconds while our crew sets up
the next cartoon. So, I was just wondering,
could I show you a cartoon that I drew myself today and could you tell me
if it’s good enough for “The New Yorker”? -Mm-hmm.
-Okay. Ready? Be honest. Alright. It’s two guys
on a desert island, and one of them is saying,
“I can’t find the stapler.” [ Laughter ] -Well, you know, Seth, we have three baskets
at the cartoon meeting. -Oh, great.
-Yeah. “Yes,” “maybe,”
and the other basket. -Okay, great. -That’s where I think
the stapler goes. [ Laughter ] -Okay.
[ Applause ] Now, because I showed it
to you, do you have to pay me? -Yeah.
[ Laughter ] -Our next cartoon
is by Maddie Dai. -Do I need it? Does it spark joy? [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -David, talk us
through that one. -It’s a good boom box. Seth, Marie Kondo. You know Marie Kondo?
-Yes, of course. -Marie Kondo has caused
a worldwide phenomenon with her Konmari method of
decluttering, and this burglar is
simply putting it to use. -Okay.
[ Laughter ] Now, I have a question. What do you, David Remnick, own
that sparks joy? -That would have
to be my Bowflex. You know, you may not know it,
Seth, but from the neck down, I’m Hugh Jackman.
-Oh. Wow. [ Laughter ] And what would be
the second thing you’d keep? -All “The New Yorkers”
I have not yet read. -Okay, and how many is that?
-Almost all of them. -Oh, just like everybody else?
[ Laughter ] Now, we learn something new
every day. Our next cartoon
is by Edward Steed. -This explains the penis
we saw downstairs. [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -David, I have many questions.
-Shoot. -First, what was that?
-I have no idea. -Okay, next question. Where did that cartoon
take place? -Don’t know.
-Okay. Were the two people
in an apartment belonging to a giant or was it a museum where some
sort of giant was on display? -No clue. -Okay, and were the people
in the cartoon very, very small and the naked man was
normal size or were the people normal size
and the man was very, very big? -Don’t know.
-Okay, final question. Why do you like that cartoon?
-It has the word “penis” in it. -Ah, great.
[ Laughter ] Is there anything
you’d like to say before we look at
our final cartoon? -No. Instead I’d like to talk to
my teenaged fans out there. -Oh, you have teenaged fans? -I’m a teen icon, Seth. -Okay, great.
[ Laughter ] Go ahead.
[ Cheers and applause ] -What up, all you Remaniacs? it’s the leader of our squad,
David Remnick, telling you that, once again,
the hippest, grooviest party in town is
“The New Yorker” festival, running from October 11th
through 13th, and all your favorites
will be there — Billie Eilish, K-pop bands BTS,
GOT7, Exo, Blackpink, and a special performance
by Post Malone. So be there or be square. -Yeah, David, I read
the New York festival listing, and I don’t think any of those
people are supposed to be there. [ Laughter ] -That’s a shame. You’re right.
I read the wrong card. -Gotcha. -I meant Speaker of the House of
Representatives, Nancy Pelosi. -Oh, right, right, right.
[ Cheers and applause ] That makes more sense.
That makes more sense. -But she will be giving out
free doses of Molly. -Oh, well, okay. There you go.
[ Laughter ] You are a teen icon.
-Yes. -Our final cartoon is
by Drew Panckeri. Let’s take a look. -Alright,
but just one more episode. [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -“The Late Night Players,”
everyone. We’ll be right back.

59 thoughts on “Live New Yorker Cartoons: Parsley, Puritans”

  1. Starting with the real cartoon, then dissolving to live doesn't work as well for me. It presents redundant information and shifts focus off the joke and onto the staging.

  2. I can't be the only comedy fan thinking of 'Brass eye' and 'The Day Today'… Both Chris Morris news parody shows, search YouTube for 'Brant physical cartoonist' which had this idea as if it were a feature of a straight news show. If you're going to watch the original shows headsets was given more freedom to push boundaries and is the funnier of the two for it

  3. Allie is correct, because the last thing I want to do to a woman tied to a stake is to burn her… (with her consent, of course. Phew!)

  4. The burglar character still has the boombox with him at the end when they all take a bow. Perhaps it DOES spark joy!

  5. I'm too low brow to ever get New Yorker jokes. I understand them, but do not "get" them. These are anti-jokes if you will . Jokes that Alexa decides to blurt out at you when they aren't funny to begin with and you happen to be attending a funeral ceremony.

    But seth, at least you can make an anti-joke worth watching. No, these still weren't funny, but the effort deserves kuddos as does this bowl of weed. Cheers

  6. A funny cartoon would be trump,swinging his driver, tripping ,and impaling himself with the driver via the rectum ,and his staff giving him the soft golf clap,nice one sir , nice one

  7. It’s obvious that the guy in that cartoon is the giant and the other ones are normal sized, after all they have buildings their size and he smashed through the floor. So the living system is theirs.

  8. The last cartoon:
    when you want to see the last season of Game of Thrones before you die at all costs – only to die very disappointed and bitter 😂

  9. "All the New Yorkers I have not yet read."
    "Okay, and how many is that?"
    "Almost all of them."
    "Oh, just like everybody else."

  10. Cilantro (or coriander as we call it) is essential for anything made with lentils. Give me lentil soup or dahl without it and there's going to be an unseemly outburst, right there at the dinner table.

  11. If you don't like cilantro, you are not among the civilized. Enjoy your blandass tacos and tasteless posole, white people.

  12. The first on is a little racist. Cilantro is a major ingredient in a lot Mexican cooking. Leave it to white guy to hate cilantro so much.

  13. Lol…funny hearing the names of BTS on our Seth's show…I know they are on holiday…kekeke..so I knew instantly that was a joke

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