Cartoon Donald Trump Can’t Stop Tweeting

Cartoon Donald Trump Can’t Stop Tweeting


( APPLAUSE )
>>Stephen: JON BATISTE AND STAY HUMAN RIGHT OVER THERE. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>>Jon: HEY! HEY!>>Stephen: JON, GOOD TO SEE
YOU. AS ALWAYS. I JUST WANT TO TAKE A SECOND
RIGHT HERE, I JUST WANT TO TAKE A SECOND RIGHT HERE TO
RECOGNIZE– TO RECOGNIZE,s THIS IS THE 73rd ANNIVERSARY
OF D-DAY. ON THIS DATE IN 1944, THE
LARGEST AMPHIBIOUS LANDING IN THE WORLD HAPPENED ON THE SHORES
OF NORMANDY TO LIBERATE FRANCE AND EUROPE FROM THE NAZIS. AND THERE ARE STILL WWII
VETERANS OUT THERE WHO FOUGHT ON THAT DAY. GO FIND ONE, GIVE HIM A KISS,
ALL RIGHT. ( APPLAUSE )
INCLUDING– AND I DON’T KNOW IF I TOLD YOU THIS– INCLUDING MY
UNCLE EDDIE, WHO WAS IN THE 101st AIRBORNE AND WENT IN
EIGHT HOURS BEFORE D-DAY TO CUT WIRES BEHIND ENEMY LINES AND HE
GOT CAUGHT IMMEDIATELY AND THEN ESCAPED AND RAN OFF, AND JOINED
UP WITH HIS UNIT. YEAH. THANK YOU, EDDIE.( APPLAUSE )
( CHEERS )
NOW, FOLKS, THE PRESIDENT’S
EXECUTIVE ORDER BLOCKING IMMIGRANTS FROM SIX
MUSLIM-MAJORITY COUNTRIES IS HEADED TO THE SUPREME COURT. IRONICALLY, IT COULD BE PEOPLE
IN ROBES THAT STOP DONALD TRUMP FROM BANNING PEOPLE IN ROBES. BUT THE ADMINISTRATION STILL HAS
A SHOT TO WIN THIS ONE IF THEY CAN CONVINCE THE COURT THAT THE
ORDER IS NOT AN UNCONSTITUTIONAL TRAVEL BAN. AND THEY HAVE BEEN VERY, VERY
DISCIPLINED WITH THIS MESSAGE.>>THIS IS NOT A TRAVEL BAN.>>IT IS NOT A TRAVEL BAN.>>IT IS NOT A TRAVEL BAN.>>BECAUSE WHEN WE USE WORDS
LIKE “TRAVEL BAN” THAT MISREPRESENTS WHAT IT IS.>>Stephen: AND THEN YESTERDAY
ON TWITTER THE PRESIDENT BACKED THEM UP, AND OFF A CLIFF. “PEOPLE, THE LAWYERS AND THE
COURTS CAN CALL IT WHATEVER THEY WANT, BUT I AM CALLING IT WHAT
WE NEED AND WHAT IT IS, A TRAVEL BAN!”
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
ENJOY, TRAVEL BAN! THEN HE CONTINUED SUPPORTING
THEM UNDER THE BUS. “THAT’S RIGHT, WE NEED A TRAVEL
BAN FOR CERTAIN DANGEROUS COUNTRIES, NOT SOME POLITICALLY
CORRECT TERM THAT WON’T HELP US PROTECT OUR PEOPLE!”
SIR, YOU’RE REALLY HURTING YOUR OWN CASE. YOU USED TO CALL IT A MUSLIM
BAN. TRAVEL BAN IS THE POLITICALLY
CORRECT TERM, AS IN, I DON’T LIKE THOSE “TRAVELERS” WITH
THEIR “TRAVEL” BEARDS WHEN AND THEY PRAY ON THEIR “TRAVEL”
RUGS. THESE TWEETS THREW THE WHITE
HOUSE INTO COMPLETE DISARRAY, WHICH WAS A REFRESHING BREAK
FROM THE USUAL SPITEFUL CHAOS. SO, THEY SENT OUT WHITE HOUSE
ADVISOR AND RADIO SHACK MANAGER WHO IS NOT GOING TO ACCEPT A
RETURN WITHOUT A RECEIPT, SEBASTIAN GORKA, WHO EXPLAINED
THAT THE PRESIDENT’S TWEETS ARE NOT POLICY.>>HIS TWEETS ARE THE POLICY. THEY ARE STATEMENTS FROM THE
PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.>>THEY ARE NOT POLICY. IT’S NOT POLICY.>>OF COURSE IT IS.>>IT’S SOCIAL MEDIA, CHRIS. IT’S SOCIAL MEDIA. IT’S NOT SOCIAL MEDIA. IT’S HIS WORDS, HIS THOUGHTS.>>IT’S NOT POLICY. IT’S NOT AN EXECUTIVE ORDER. IT’S SOCIAL MEDIA. PLEASE UNDERSTAND THE
DIFFERENCE.>>Stephen: OKAY, I UNDERSTAND
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN POLICY AND SOCIAL MEDIA. I DON’T UNDERSTAND THE
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND A DOUCHEBAG. PLEASE UNDERSTAND THE
DIFFERENCE. PLEASE. PLEASE UNDERSTAND THE
DIFFERENCE. BUT LOUD AND CLEAR, OKAY. I GET THE MESSAGE– PRESIDENT
TRUMP’S TWEETS ARE NOT CONSIDERED OFFICIAL
STATEMENTS, END OF– I’M SORRY, WHAT?>>ARE PRESIDENT TRUMP’S TWEETS
CONSIDERED OFFICIAL WHITE HOUSE STATEMENTS?>>WELL, THE PRESIDENT IS THE
PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, SO THEY’RE CONSIDERED OFFICIAL
STATEMENTS BY THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.>>Stephen: GAH! ( LAUGHTER )
OH! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AAAH! WHAT COULD POSSIBLY HAVE
HAPPENED IN THE LAST 24 HOURS TO ACCOUNT FOR A 180 LIKE THAT? “THE FAKE MAIN STREET MEDIA IS
WORKING SO HARD TRYING TO GET ME NOT TO USE SOCIAL MEDIA. THEY HATE THAT I CAN GET THE
HONEST AND UNFILTERED MESSAGE OUT.” OH, YES. OH, YES, THE MEDIA HATES IT. AND LET ME JUST SAY SOMETHING
QUICKLY TO DONALD TRUMP. FIRST OF ALL, THANKS FOR
WATCHING, SIR. SECOND, SECOND, AS AN HONORARY
MEMBER OF THE MEDIA, PLEASE STOP SWEETING, ESPECIALLY EARLY IN
THE MORNING, BECAUSE WE HAVE TO WRITE ABOUT IT ALL DAY LONG. SOME DAYS, WE COME UP WITH TOO
MANY JOKES, AND WE HAVE SOME LEFT OVER FOR THE NEXT DAY, AND
I CAN START DRINKING EARLY. SO NO TWEETING, NONE! I DEMAND IT! HERE’S THE THING– EVERYBODY
KNOWS THIS TWEETING IS A DISASTER, SO WHY DOES HE KEEP
DOING IT? AND WHY SO OFTEN? HIS FREQUENCY OF TWEETING, EVEN
FOR HIM, HAS BECOME CARTOONISH. HERE TO EXPLAIN, PLEASE WELCOME
CARTOON DONALD TRUMP. THANK YOU, SIR. CARTOON DONALD TRUMP, EVERYBODY. LOVELY, YOU LOOK LOVELY, SIR. THANK YOU FOR JOINING US,
MR. CARTOON PRESIDENT.>>I PLEAD THE FIFTH.>>Stephen: THIS ISN’T A TRIAL,
AND I HAVEN’T ASKED YOU ANYTHING YET.>>JUST PRACTICING. THAT’S WHAT WINNERS DO.>>Stephen: ARE YOU CONCERNED
ABOUT THE NEWS THAT RUSSIANS MAY HAVE HACKED OUR ELECTION?>>NO. HILLARY LOST BECAUSE SHE DIDN’T
CAMPAIGN IN THE SWING STATES: MICHIGAN, WISCONSIN, MOSCOW. IT’S A RED STATE. ( LAUGHTER )
COME ON, WE KNOW IT IS.>>Stephen: I UNDERSTAND, I
UNDERSTAND. SO, YOU AREN’T NERVOUS ABOUT
JAMES COMEY’S UPCOMING TESTIMONY BEFORE CONGRESS? THEY SAY HE TOOK NOTES OF EVERY
INAPPROPRIATE THING YOU SAID TO HIM.>>COME ON, NO ONE HAS TIME TO
WRITE DOWN EVERY INAPPROPRIATE THING I SAY, NOT EVEN ME. HERE COMES ONE NOW. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT’S GOING
TO BE. “ROSIE O’DONNELL IS A MUSLIM AND
A HOAX. ENJOY!”
( LAUGHTER )>>Stephen: I DON’T THINK YOU
UNDERSTAND. ALL THESE RECKLESS TWEETS ARE
HURTING YOUR OWN AGENDA. WHEN YOU WERE ABROAD A COUPLE OF
WEEKS AGO, ON TOUR OF MIDDLE EASTERN EUROPE, THINGS WENT
REALLY WELL IN PART BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T TWEET.>>I WANTED TO, BUT I COULDN’T
CHARGE MY PHONE. THEY HAVE WEIRD PLOIFERGZ THERE. THAT’S WHY I DROPPED OUT OF THE
STUPID PARIS THING.>>Stephen: YOU CAN’T STOP
TWEETING.>>I CAN STOP ANY TIME I WANT,
STEPHEN. “I CAN STOP TWEET ANYTHING TIME
I WANT, STEPHEN.>>Stephen: SEE WHAT I’M
SAYING?>>ALL RIGHT, I’LL STOP, WILL
POWER.>>Stephen: LET ME ASK YOU
ABOUT THE HEALTH CARE FIGHT–>>JUST A QUICKIE. JUST A QUICKIE. “FAKE NEWS. LIES ALL ABOUT THE TRAVEL BAN. WE MUST DOT, DOT, DOT. ”
( LAUGHTER )>>Stephen: WE MUST WHAT?>>I DON’T KNOW, MIDSENTENCE IS
THE ONLY TIME I STOP TWEETING. ENJOY!>>Stephen: CARTOON DONALD
TRUMP, EVERYBODY. WE’LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
SALMA HAYEK PINAULT.

100 thoughts on “Cartoon Donald Trump Can’t Stop Tweeting”

  1. This is a serious addiction associated with mental disorder. For ''tis reason, it is difficult to break the addiction.

  2. Could Trump please fuck america over a bit more slowly so we can at least keep up? No one expects him to not fuck it up at all so he could at least play more golf or something…

  3. Cartoon Trump is the shiznit…for another funny Trump Cartoon search "How Donald Trump Makes His Decisions" it's a must see!

  4. 1:42 I like how the red field behind the shot of Trump makes it look like his tie is extending beyond the picture. His absurdly long tie will not be denied!

  5. YOU HAD TO USE A CARTOON FOR YOUR BULLSHIT LIES EVEN JIM CARRY KNOWS YOUR PART OF THE BULLSHIT QUEER SHOW BOAT AND THE MUSLIM BAN WASNT AS WORSE AS OBAMA AND HE SURPLYED THE REBELS AND LOOK AT THE PARIS ATTACKS AND ENGLAND ATTACKS AND MORE Y DONT YOU MAKE A JOKE ABOUT THAT YOU LOSER AND YOUR NOT FUNNY

  6. Whoever voices Cartoon Trump deserves a damn Emmy. His lines sound like audio clips from the Idiot-In-Chief himself.

  7. Gorka is a phony, Spicer is a dweeb and their boss is a criminal. It's not hard to figure out that it's a clown show.

  8. Can we write an amendment to the Constitution recognizing "cartoon Trump" as the REAL Donald Trump and thus making HIM president? I think he's more qualified than the original. And to be perfect honest, even though he's only 2-dimensional, he shows greater depth.

  9. "Why does he keep doing it?" Simple! He has the mentality of a 12 year old girl! . . . and, ironically, the hands of a 12 year old girl too. (Sorry, it was right there!) And a small portion of the US thought he was a good idea?????

  10. I'm glad I'm not American. stupid President with stupid people who believe everything mainstream media and biased talk shows say. that's why I don't watch the news anymore, every Chanel says exact same thing except with a different accent

  11. The level of humor on the late Show is hitting new lows. Now it is nothing else than juvenile attempts at corny jokes and Corbyn making "funny" faces. "I don't understand the difference between you and a douchebag" – gee Corbyn, most mature TV joke ever. Even back in middle school my friends would consider this line childish and lame. Is Trump paying you for your political jokes to be this bad?

    Corbyn should retire, if we ever want to see "The late Show" instead of "The Lame Show". Lastly to get this out of the way – I dislike Donald Trump and didn't vote for him.

  12. Remember D-Day? Where the US like… fought for freedom? Yeah they forgot the importance of freedom and what bad politics can lead to quickly.

  13. Are you lames enjoying watching these people bashing the leader of the country you live in. It would be even funnier if you lived elsewhere. Plane tickets are still available and affordable. Bye bye.

  14. I wonder what he'd look like without hair spray? And if he parted it down the middle? I always want to cut the back shorter so it won't go over his collar. I wonder what he does all day long since he can't read. They say he watches four TV's at one time. Probably hoping someone will say something nice about him. I don't think he understands when people mock him. He's mentally ill and it's no joke. I hope someone's baby sitting him to keep him away from the nuclear codes. Songs

  15. I LOVE WW2 BATTLES AND D-DAY IS MY FAVORITE AND I'M A KID AND I KNEW WHEN D-DAY WAS A LONG TIME A GO WHICH IS JUNE 6 1944♡♡♡♡♡♡

  16. Donald Trump tweets all the time when he said Obama tapped his wires why would he have to do that all he have to do and look at Donald Trump tweets he can find out all the information that he needs ..how can his statements be considered a Fishel us statements on tweets on Twitter

  17. America: "The White House is on fire!"
    WH: "No, it's not, that's fake news. In fact, it's even a little cold. I don't know, I can't really feel anything right now."
    America: "But you're literally engulfed in flames!"
    WH: "I don't know what you're talking about, this is completely normal. Maybe it's the failing MSM that's on fire!"
    Becomes pile of ashes

  18. Stephen Colbert lost his respect. I like him questioning trump but he’s a democratic cock sucker!! Ask some questions about Hillary’s criminal charges! Be honest instead of getting money from democrats!

  19. We get it Steve, you hate Trump and love socialism. We are winning as a country because of Trump and you can't handle it. Stop your whining.

  20. Actually, it's a good thing that Trump is tweeting, because everything fake news is fake. Good thing he's exposing the shady ass FBI and the lying media. Also, it's the reason why he won as president. So keep on tweeting. I'm voting for you in 2020!

  21. Stephens should have never left the Colbert report. This show just sucks.

    Do comedy for everyone not just those who feel like you.

  22. I think he is very funny, love the contradictions. Wonder what the Whitehouse psychologist thinks. Presidents and vice presidents should be tested regularly to see if they are fit for office. Otherwise more dictators.

  23. Who's next next in line if Trump gets impeached ohhhh Mike pence who does tweet we could be in deeper trouble but who cares

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